On Changing Habits

A personal reflection on my habits that I want to discuss here is that I hang on to things too long. For just the sake of it, for the sake of analyzing the situation or something, I tend to think about a situation for too long.

Even tiny things like why some one did not take my call, get me thinking over them for a long time. This is a thing I have been trying to change for a while and have tried a lot to taking things just casually. Over time, things have become better but it wasn't easy, not at easy at all.

All of us - every single one of us - has at least one change we need to make in our lives. We know very well what change needs to take place, and we certainly know WHY we want it to come about. The WHY may be better relationships, better health, better management of time or a better future. Whatever the details, the change will be one that we know will add happiness and peace to our lives.

Seems simple enough, right? What person in his or her right mind wouldn't do whatever needed to be done to bring more happiness into their lives?

Unfortunately, there's a reason I wrote "Seems simple enough" rather than just "Simple enough." Change is hard! Funny, we always look at people around us and ask, "Why won't ____ just change?" or "Why can't ______ just stop making merry and study? He's not even trying!" Yet, when it comes to ourselves we fully recognize how difficult it is to change habits - many of which are habits of a lifetime. Habits get us in just as little as 21 days and all too often these habits have been with us for as long as 21 weeks, 21 months or even 21 years. 

Right through this ordeal I went through while changing my habit, I finally got a solution to this real hard problem.

I guess you would like to know about it. 

While I was trying to get rid of my habit of of thinking excessively, I on the contrary gave my mind another "thing" to think about obsessively. On realizing this, I decided to replace by habit with another one than just getting rid of the one I had.

The point I a trying to make here is that a part of the solution lies in battling FOR something rather than just battling AGAINST something. Focus on the positive - how wonderful you'll feel once you're standing on the winning side, how proud everyone who loves you will be of you, and how you'll be in a position, then, to help others.

This is the commitment each one of us needs to have in order to get to the other side of it.

Good luck!! :)

On Success and Following your Heart...

suc·cess

/səkˈsɛs/ Show Spel

–noun

1. 

the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors.

2.

the attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like.

3.

a successful performance or achievement.

4.

a person or thing that is successful.

These are the results of a search I did on dictionary.com for the meaning of the word "success".

Now, getting to the point.

Success is not an absolute term at all. It is a relative one.

Success is not defined on terms set by society and other people; we need to create own definition of the term, one that gives us peace, satisfaction and happiness. We live in a world where we’re expected to adhere to certain norms and standards; we’re supposed to meet certain expectations in order to be declared a success; we’re judged according to standards set by people who think they matter. So it’s a matter of pride to do well at school, gain admission to an IIT, an IIM or a may be a good medical school and secure a placement at a firm that gives you the best "package" among your pals. A trend in today's youth is to adhere to these conventional rules that the society has made for them.

If you take an alternative path, you’re pitied or looked down upon, unless you achieve worldwide success i.e. an artist, writer or sportsperson who aspires to take the road less traveled does not gain recognition or support unless they become renowned in the field they’ve chosen. The point I’m trying to make here is that your personal happiness is linked inextricably with your idea of success. So if you define success by society’s or your parents’ (or anyone else’s) standards, you’re never going to be happy unless you reach those standards. And though your heart may lie elsewhere, you’re going to ruin your life by trying to achieve something that’s beyond your reach, just because you think that that’s what success is.

 A similar case is about the students who are "building" hobbies now, so that they have something to write on their resumes. This is a stupid practice(no offense intended for anyone in particular). Faking being somebody else will not lead you anywhere. By the time we are 30, we will feel completely lost and the chances of finding a way then will be a lot more difficult than it is today.

Dissatisfaction with life and an emotional bankruptcy, at some point later in life, can prove to be very expensive even if you have a big and heavy bank account.

  
It is not too late to find out what your heart has been secretly whispering in your ears for a long time. Listen to your heart, and find your calling.

I will end this at a positive note.

You are all brilliant people out there. You can do well, even a job, you hardly care about.

But, as a great man once said, when skill and heart work together, you can expect a master piece.

Awaiting one from you!